CHIP CHAT

Greetings - 

In my most recent adventure, I have crossed paths with a snack food made by Utz Quality Foods: “The Crab Chip.” The thing about this gem of a chip that first caught my eye was the two crabs on the bag with the words “NO PRESERVATIVES” printed underneath them. It was like the crabs were guards that were keeping preservatives from getting into the chips. Upon further inspection, i noticed that the chips were seasoned with Chesapeake Bay. This peaked my interest. I quickly made my purchase and hurried home with my chreasure. Yes, that is the word “Chip” and the word “Treasure” combined. Fuck You.

I made myself a beautiful sandwich (which I should start another blog for,) and pulled open the bag of chips. I was immediately greeted by the farty scent of nitrogen, which is a good sign when it comes to chips. I will only eat chips which are packaged with inert gasses. I’ll explain this science in a future post. Anyways, I finished my sandwich and was about to taste my first crab chip. I first noticed the nice texture and weight of the chip. Not too thick, and not too flimsy like horse shit LAYS chips. The first taste was a perfect finish to my sandwich, replacing the turkey and sunflower-bran bread tastes with a refreshing paprika and celery salt flavor. The familiar taste of Chesapeake Bay seasoning combined with a perfectly cooked potato chip flavor was outstanding. Chip after chip, I was amazed with the consistent quality.

Alas, all chips come to an end and its time to crush the remaining remnants of chips in the bag and drink them. As usual, a lot of the seasoning from chips settles to the bottom of the bag and makes for a pleasant finish. With “The Crab Chip,” the extra seasoning makes the finish a bit too salty and had me grabbing for my diet cherry pepsi to wash the salt away. Overall, this chip was great. A nice, consistent chip with great flavor, but a salty finish. I give it a 9 out of 10.

In summation, Mama Pajama would roll out of bed and run down to get some of these chips.

Chips,

Gary.